Fearless with kindness
It was many years ago when I received word that I got a job in
television news in the Atlanta metro area. I had been living on Ohio's north
coast for all of my life up until that point. I was excited about embarking on
my then-new adventure in the South. On the last visit to my hair stylist Connie that
summer, I received her sage "Atlanta advice." Connie, like millions
before her, was one of those people who passed through Atlanta on the way to
somewhere else. Many of you who have lived in the Atlanta metro area for a time
get the picture: People pass through, they become "ersatz experts" on the city
and dole out the usual observations about the town with their "hundreds of
Peachtrees," sweet tea and "those nice, talkative Southern folks who
would give you the shirt off their backs" stories. "They're nice
people down there," Connie said. "And one other thing, they got
heat."
Connie was right. I moved to the Atlanta metro area in the heat of
that summer, started my job and a few weeks in, I met a co-worker named Melissa.
Here I was along with thousands of others who
moved to this metropolis in search of an identity. Many of us
were young, not too far out of college and doing our best to navigate this
region "full of Peachtrees."
What made the transition to living in the Atlanta area easier was
meeting many kind folks. Still, none of those folks measured up to
Melissa. After thinking about what set Melissa apart from others is
this: Melissa was fearless with her kindness. The South was her home and she
welcomed all who arrived into it with open arms. That very kindness inspired
Melissa to approach anyone in her line of sight. It didn't
matter who you were or where you came from - Melissa enjoyed the art of
conversation with the world.
Like my own mother, Melissa was able to get your life's story within
seconds. If you were a brick house, Melissa was able to break down those walls
and get you to “spill your guts."
I was one of those brick houses that Melissa was able to collapse.
While we quickly discovered that we had few things in common at that time, we learned and
grew from each other. It didn't take long to become more than colleagues, but
trusted friends. We went along with other co-workers to restaurants like La Bamba, a
then-Mexican hole-in-the-wall that was in an old Midtown Atlanta area house.
So here we were, working in the television business. We got to
meet a bevy of interesting folks ranging from actors and politicians to working
with the behind-the-scenes crew and on-air talent. Trust me when I say that it
seemed like every one of those folks who passed through the hallowed halls of
our place of work in those days got to know Melissa.
I'm attempting to exaggerate here, but there's a side to me that thinks I am
not really exaggerating. Melissa had no problem making her presence known. That
gregarious spirit came from her upbringing in Swainsboro, Georgia where she
must have grabbed the spotlight on a daily basis.
One time, the cafeteria at work was serving hot wings. In her sweet Southeastern U.S. accent, Melissa said to me, "Bobby, they got 'wangs' down
there!" I replied in my Midwest tone, "Wings? Really?" Flip, our
weather guy chimed in, "I love it! North meets South!"
It was more than just
"North meets South." We got to know more about each other as the
years went on at work. We got to know our significant others at the time.
We got to know about our families. I
discovered that I was two weeks older than she was. She never let me forget
that one. In some of our spare time, we went to see movies like Born
on the Fourth of July and showed up at festivals. We discussed
just about everything including cultural issues, our hopes, dreams, fears,
work-related matters and other things that life threw at all of us.
While we went on to other areas within our company over the
years, our paths crossed. We discussed marriages, my child, divorces and career changes. Even
though Melissa enjoyed working within the television news business, I'm not
quite sure she found her exact niche. Certainly, Melissa loved running the
audio board, rubbing elbows with the television anchors, producers and
directors, but overall, her calling was to be in front of an audience. Melissa
didn't find that calling while working in television news. She found that calling
as a chef/caterer. From my little perch here in life, it seemed to me that
Melissa truly enjoyed this type of work and was inspired by the likes of TV
chef/mega-entrepreneur Paula Deen.
In recent years, we kept in touch through social media. I told Melissa all about my girlfriend, Cami. Melissa was happy for me-mainly because Cami hails from a region far south of where I grew up. Melissa told me about how she not only found her happiness and her Shangri-La in South Georgia, but also that she found the love of her life in a wonderful man named Chuck.
In recent years, we kept in touch through social media. I told Melissa all about my girlfriend, Cami. Melissa was happy for me-mainly because Cami hails from a region far south of where I grew up. Melissa told me about how she not only found her happiness and her Shangri-La in South Georgia, but also that she found the love of her life in a wonderful man named Chuck.
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